Edge of Moving On
by Beyond Forgetting
Summary: Taken into consideration a month after Meg had her first heartbreak and before she met Hercules. This is how she decided to be what she is right after her heartbreak and before she met the boy who changed her wrong perspective about love.


This is just a quick drabble about Meg. I just poured out what my brain wants to say. LOL. No edits and whatsoever.

Taken into consideration a month after Meg had her first heartbreak and before she met Hercules.

PS: I'm not brokenhearted today so yeah.

Diary Entry # 143

Edge of Moving On

Before I give up believing in love, I want to have some release of what I had viewed when I was under the Cupid's stupid spell.

I became dumb and all. I know I'm born smart and intelligent but it's just love that made my heart very weak.

I really thought he is the one. All Gods knew how I love him very much. I just can't decipher at first the point why he left me .. just like what Hades said, for some babe.

I gave him my all, even my soul! Now my life is bounded for Hades. Aside from giving him all the blame, I wanted to hate myself for being so stupid. For trusting, for ..

FALLING FOR THE WRONG ONE.

But isn't it just the consequence of love? You have to bet for it. You have to risk for it. Let's just even say it's a matter of life and death. It is a win and lose situation. Either you reach the heavens for having him or scorch your life to death when he's gone.

But you know what hurts me the most? The fact that I already gave up my soul to save him, but it's not enough for him. He tossed it all in the trash like it's nothing. LIKE I'M NOTHING.

What do you think I would view to myself now?

THAT I'M NOT ENOUGH. THAT I'M WORTHLESS. THAT I'M JUST ONLY FOR HIS FUCKING ENTERTAINMENT.

Now I have learned that LIFE AND LOVE ARE NEVER JUST.

And starting today, I will never trust anyone. I will never fall in love again, like EVER. I'm done with the broken promises, I'm done with the sweet lies and I'm done making myself a fool. I don't want to be inferior again, especially to men.

His so called "Love" has done enough for me.

I've met many men, and I've learned that all of them just want me because of my beauty. Question: Why did he broke-up with me? Well because he found another toy.

I know what men are. They only love the girl when she is beautiful, or if not, rich. Or a public figure, or anything that would give them more advantage.

I just can't figure out why these things keep on happening to me. All I did was to trust and do good things for the one that I love but is this the prize of being kind-hearted? All I did was to give but I did not receive any. This is UNFAIR. Especially the fact that the one who loves the most, hurts the most.

I DON'T DESERVE THIS.

Every guy has proved me the same thing. Why bother love? Why bother sing songs out of love when it does not exist?

TRUE LOVE DOES NOT EXIST. FOREVER DOES NOT EXIST. BUT BROKEN PROMISES AND LIES DO.

If you trust, then you are just one of the fools.

Now I just realized, since I'm one of the devil's minions now, I can now be a bitch. I can now express my anger. I can now hurt them like they have hurt me. I have the right to get revenge to all men, like, they are just all slimes anyway.

Boys, get ready because here I come. I'm going to stay what I am right now, make the boys fall in love with me, and crush their hearts like what he did to me. This is going to be exciting.

Or is it? Life bounded by Hades?

Honestly I'm scared. But since Hades is also part of the men population, I also despise him. I mean he is the leader of these men. They are all devils in my eyes.

WAIT. I must not hate life even though I have all the points why I should. Better not stress myself to them, I think I'll be concentrating on appreciating small things, the things that make me happy, like playing hooky, or watch movies and plays.

I miss my family. Urgh. These shits I'm enduring are because of falling in love with that guy.

Yep. I can't go home yet. My family knew I'm dead which is good because I don't want Hades to go near them. Sacrificial? Well, yes.

Right. I'll be the better version of me. If they are all petty and dishonest, then I'll be better than that. They'll get what they want then.

I'm going to be independent. I'm going to be strong. And I will only trust myself. I'm going to be alone.

It's better to be alone, nobody can hurt you anyway.

If no one can love me, then I'll be off in isolation. Besides, I can't hurt myself.

What is my view of men now?

I think I'm going to prefer hurting them than let them hurt me. And I think that would be your logic too if you are on my side.

They've made me feel like I'm just down here and they are all up there. I don't want that. This is too much for discrimination. I've learned enough. No man is worth the aggravation because they are all the same.

I'll be off with myself now. No love commitments. There will be no chance for myself falling in love again. This is my last chance of saying I'm falling in love.

I promise I will never utter "I'm in love" because those words are like my suicidal words.

Alright! then let's start this fucking hell life.

Rule number one: Stay what I am. Make them fall in love with me and crush their hearts.


End file.
